Why 'Maybe' is Holding You Back (And How to Fix It)

Ever find yourself stuck in decision limbo? 🤔 In this week's newsletter, we're diving into the game-changing "Waffle Rule" - a simple yet powerful hack to banish indecision and reclaim your time.

Hey there!

I'm reviewing this edit of Creative Matters from my perch in a blue padded stadium seat awaiting the Missy Eliott World Tour concert to start. 

On episode 82 of the podcast, we talked with Elsa Amri, a Tanzanian webflow designer who expressed how she prioritizes her Zone of Genius as a freelancer. 

In thinking about the decisions Elsa made to ensure the success of her design studio, my thoughts fell on a simple life hack that's, well, Supa Dupa Fly. 

What if I told you that indecision is a form of making a decision?  

The Waffle Rule - which has nothing to do with hot and yummy brunch fare - is the fast track to reclaiming time and removing doubt from life. The Waffle Rule helps differentiate between fruitless indecision, hesitation, and thoughtful deliberation.

Indecision Paralysis

Say, you have a busy month of activities and deliverables. Your phone buzzes.  

A text comes in.  A good friend invites you to a party tomorrow evening. Going out sounds fun, though right now, your heart isn't into conversing with others. You’re tired and could use a night to relax. Who knows you might actually get 8 hours of sleep for once. 

Should you stay in? Your comfy sweats are calling your name! Should you go out? Do you even have anything clean to wear out? You really should decline.  

Instead, you send a text saying:  Maybe. Sound familiar?  

The Waffle Rule: If you are unsure about which decision to make, your default answer should be: NO. 

In the past, you’ve made countless decisions with no hesitation. That’s because when a topic or a decision truly aligns with your values, with your deepest wish and with your goals, you don't waffle. 

A decision that doesn’t cause friction is a, Hell Yeah!

Hesitation is a clue

Sometimes seeking clarity is like turning on the radio in your car. When you hit the right station, the music comes through. When you are in between stations, itchy static hiss through the speakers. 

When you waffle, you are in between stations. You choose static instead of your desired station.

To recap!

Right station = Hell yes!

Static and interference = Waffle = No

You know the feeling you get stuck in long traffic delays?  Well, your brain does not like Maybes because maybes increases cognitive load. In essence, a large part of your working memory is spent thinking about whether or not you should say yes or no.  

Aligned decisions leave you in a better mood, reduce stress, increase self-esteem, and improve your focus.

The Waffle Rule for Big Decisions

You're likely thinking, what about big decisions? Since when you're waffling, you're likely unsure of your choice, the Waffle Rule can be especially valuable for major life decisions. 

When faced with life-changing choices, our intuition often speaks louder. If you're waffling about getting married, changing careers, or moving to a new city, it might indicate that you're not fully committed or excited about the prospect.

These big decisions should come with a sense of certainty or excitement, even if there's some natural anxiety involved. 

We see the Waffle Rule in action in Episode 83 of This is How We Create.  Photographer, Anastassia Whitty–master of creating deep connections with her subject, talked to us about leaving her day job. 

Anastassia said, “I knew that my mental health was deteriorating working there. And I had to make a decision. What I was gonna do? 

Let this job go or let it take full control of me. 

And I realized that there came to a point where I couldn't do it anymore. I ended up in the hospital. And that was that point where I was like, okay, I can't do this anymore. So I had to let it go.”

The Waffle Rule doesn't mean making snap judgments, instead, it highlights when your hesitation is telling you something important. It encourages you to dig deeper into why you're uncertain. Your hesitation points may also reveal crucial insights about your true desires and values.

In essence, the Waffle Rule is not a replacement for thoughtful decision-making; it’s a tool to make the decision process more effective and aligned with your true feelings and values.

Now, don’t get me wrong, sometimes the decisions we need to make are painful, such as in the case with Anastassia. Oftentimes, as in the case with Anastassia, a sense of purpose and joy, comes at the heel of making tough decisions.

In the world of creativity and many moving pieces, clarity is essential. The Waffle Rule is your way to trust your judgment and use your hesitation to level up.

Putting the Waffle Rule into Practice

As you go through your week, when you find yourself not making quick decisions ask yourself, “Am I waffling?” What’s more, I have a 5 Step Plan that you can access here to help you build your No muscle.

My family now throws around the phrase, “Are you Waffling?” to remind each other to make speedy decisions!  It’s a wee bit annoying to be lectured by a Tween, that said, every day we get better and better at making decisions.

Stay Creative, friend

Martine x